Step-by-step guide to getting your toddler to sleep in their own bed

Baby Sleep – 12 Feb 24 By bountyteam

Exhausted parents, listen up!

Do you spend your nights clinging to the edge of the bed while your toddler sprawls across the middle?

Then follow our bedtime success plan and there will be two, not three of you in the bed by the end of the weekend.

Read on, for expert advice for getting your toddler to sleep in their own bed

How to get your toddler to sleep in their own bed

DAY 1 – Saturday day time

Step 1

Start early. Don’t spring it on them at bedtime. Gently explain to your toddler that they will be sleeping in their own bed tonight. Make sure you’re as positive as possible as it’s difficult for your toddler to learn new sleeping habits so will need your encouragement.

Meet any protests with an upbeat and resolute response, for example, “Oh yes you are, you cheeky little one.”

Step 2

Explain to older siblings and any close neighbours that there may be some disruption for a couple of nights.

Step 3

Make a star chart for your toddler. Go out together and buy stickers. Explain that each time they stays in their own bed all night, they’ll receive a sticker.

Toddler girl with long fair hair looking at a sticker set in the shop with her smiling mum — Get your child involved by letting them choose stickers or a reward chart. *(Image: Getty)*

Step 4

Engage your child in some role-play. Put their toys to bed and give them (yes, the toys) lots of praise for staying there.

Step 5

Limit naps to an hour, and don’t allow your child to sleep after 2.30pm in the afternoon (for a 7pm to 8pm settling time). If possible, have a daytime rest yourself.

If you’re with them to fall asleep, it’s only natural that they will need to find you when they wake up during the night.

It’s important your child settles to sleep for the night in their own bed, alone.

To make settling alone easier, follow these steps to help them feel safe, secure and loved.

Mum sleeps with her back to a very comfy, fasl asleep toddler — You might find that they sleep REALLY well in your bed! *(Image: Getty)*

Saturday evening toddler sleep routine

Step 6

Develop a consistent bedtime routine that incorporates a clear sequence of sleep clues. For example: bath, clean teeth with their favourite GAIA Natural Baby Probiotic toothpaste and favourite story. Turn all screens off.

Step 7

During bath time, encourage your child to splash, play, and use up any reserves of energy. Show love him and make sure your little one feels secure. Then remind your child they will be sleeping in their own bed tonight but say it in a positive and encouraging way.

Step 8

After bath time and milk (Aptamil Gold+ Toddler is a premium toddler nutritional supplement suitable for children from one year old), go directly to your toddler’s bedroom. Keep the lights dim. Share a couple of stories, and until they know how to fall asleep on their own, always keep the final story the same.

Now is the time for you to take control be kind, calm and resolute. Say goodnight, tuck them in to bed, have a goodnight cuddle, and remind them about earning a sticker for their rewards chart. Then leave.

Toddler boy with his arms up by his head sleeps is his own bed — Settling them in their own bed is the best way for them to fall asleep. *(Image: Getty)*

Step 9

If your child calls or cries, go back and spend 30 seconds (at the most) with them. If they seem frightened, stay calm and reassuring, but don’t reinforce fears by hanging around. If they gets very distressed, sit quietly by the bed, but keep eye contact and physical contact to a minimum.

When they have settled again, say goodnight and leave the room. Tell them that you’re going to the bathroom and you’ll be back in five minutes. Make sure you keep your promise.

If they are still awake when you come back, praise them for staying in bed, leave again, and then keep returning to them until they eventually give in to sleep. Try not to be in the room when they drops off.

Step 10

If they get out of bed, put them back as many times as it takes, until they fall asleep. This may go on for some time, so be patient. Don’t close or lock the bedroom door you don’t want your child to feel excluded or punished.

Step 11

Go to bed early as you’ll probably be up in the night. If your child wakes and calls or comes to your bed, put them back in their own bed, just as you did when you were settling them. Don’t give in and allow them into your bed as this will ruin the learning process.

Children who regularly move into their parents’ bed during the night come to see their own bed as a temporary space. This actually prevents them from settling and sleeping well. Your child needs to recognise his own bed as a safe and permanent space.

Sleeping dad cuddles blonde toddler who looks cheekily wide awake — It can be hard to get our cheeky monkeys into their own bed! *(Image: Getty)*

DAY 2 – Sunday

Well done, you’re halfway there. Chances are your routine has already started to stick in your child’s mind and repeating the process will help to reinforce it.

Step 12

When your little one wakes in the morning, open the shutters giving him a clear message that it’s daytime. Even if you’re exhausted, be welcoming. Praise them enthusiastically and don’t forget to give out the sticker.

Step 13

Be especially loving towards your toddler. Tell them your proud they can now sleep on their own.

Step 14

Repeat the exact same settling process as last night, from Step 6. Don’t be disheartened if you still have to put them back to bed several times. This technique will work, but only if you’re consistent.

Step 15

No matter how tough the process seems, when you’re on the verge of giving up, remember, it takes just two nights to solve the majority of sleep problems for this age group (provided you’re committed). By the end of this second night, your child will have learned new sleeping habits.

MONDAY

You’ve done it! From now on bedtime will be much easier. Carry on with the routine and maintain your loving, resolute manner. It’s very important to reinforce what your child has learned. By next weekend your only task will be to relax and celebrate!