What is school refusal and how can you help your child?

Understanding and addressing school refusal: A guide for parents

School refusal is a growing concern among Australian families, characterised by a student’s emotional distress at attending school. Government estimates suggest that between 1% to 5% of all students experience school refusal.

Unlike truancy, which is driven by the desire to skip school for more enjoyable activities, school refusal stems from a profound aversion to the school environment.

By recognising and addressing the unique needs of students who exhibit signs of school refusal, parents and schools can work together to implement effective solutions that minimise anxiety and promote consistent attendance.

David Noble, Principal of Australian Christian College in Hobart, explans the triggers, what parents can do and how the school can support children who are struggling with school refusal.

Three stages of school refusal

1. Anxiousness or anxiety

Most people exhibit anxiousness at some point. It is especially common during significant transitions, such as starting school or moving to a new school. For school-aged children, this might show up as struggling to get up on school mornings, tantrums while trying to get ready for school, or lots of sick days or visits to the sick bay at school.

Anxiety-causing triggers leading to school refusal may include, but are not limited to: moving house, starting or changing schools, family issues including conflict, separation or divorce, mental health issues, academic difficuties, and bullying.

2. Signs of school avoidance and lower attendance

Students at this stage are noticeably missing whole or partial days of school and show higher levels of anxiety about attending. They might also be spending more time in sick bay, ‘acting up’ in order to run late to school, disrupting class or having difficulty getting back into class after lunch and break times. This stage of school refusal indicates a more serious issue that requires attention from both parents and the school.

3. Significant loss of attendance

The third stage of school refusal is when students miss significant portions of their schooling and exhibit chronic absenteeism and disruptive behaviour when in school, driven by their refusal to attend. Comprehensive interventions are usually required to support the student and ensure they can return to regular attendance.

Scroll down to learn how parents and carers can work together with teachers and the school to help get back on track.

What to do it your child shows signs of school refusal

Regardless of which stage of school refusal your child falls into, it is crucial to listen and support them effectively to prevent the situation from escalating. Here are some steps parents can implement:

Communication

Listen to your child’s concerns, validate their feelings and work towards identifying the source of the problem. Inform the school about your child’s anxiety and be open about changes at home, such as moving, parental separation, or family tragedies.

Make staying at home boring

When children exhibit signs of school refusal, they may report unexplained symptoms like headaches or stomach aches. To counter this, make staying home less appealing and as school-like as possible. Remove access to all screens and disconnect the home Wi-Fi to eliminate the comfort and fun of staying home.

Routine

Maintaining a consistent routine is crucial, especially if students have been away from school due to illness, family holidays, or other reasons. Keeping bedtime consistent and the morning routine predictable helps everyone know what is expected of them.

School response and support for school refusal

Each school will have different responses to school refusal, especially when comparing public and private institutions. Communicating with your child’s educator/s is important so you can work together to get your child back into school.

The strategies outlined below are commonly implemented among public and private schools, including the Australian Christian College Hobart.

Buddy system

Often associated with students starting school for the first time, having a familiar peer to show your child around the school and introduce them to classmates can make a significant difference when they are new, anxious or re-integrating.

Principal’s tours

Bring a prospective student along to a new school’s tour day to help familiarise them with the facilities, ask questions, and get a glimpse of the classroom environment.

Transition days

Attend orientation and transition days with your child to allow them to experience their new school and meet future classmates.

Individualised Social Plan (ISP)

Schools may implement Individualised Social Plans (ISP) to help students who start missing significant days due to school refusal connect with their classmates and address their anxieties.

Psychologists and counsellors

Students may benefit from seeing a counsellor or psychologist to provide additional support and tailor the ISP to meet the child’s needs.

Consistent adult at the school gate

Having a trusted and consistent adult to meet the struggling student at the school gate and walk them to class each day can be helpful in transitioning them back to the classroom.

Social activities and sporting groups

Encouraging students to join clubs or sports teams can help them meet like-minded peers and improve their social skills.

Recess and lunch time plans

Create plans for recess and lunch periods, such as spending time in the library or joining a social club to help reduce stress and provide a sense of structure.

Pass cards

Providing pass cards that allow students to leave the classroom and sit in a quiet space can help them self-regulate.

If the above strategies have not proved successful for your student, the school will look at any other options available to support the child integrating back to school.

What happens if traditional school is no longer an option?

Distance education – online school

Distance Education, like that provided by Australian Christian College, may be a good alternative to a traditional learning environment. Classes are taught online by qualified teachers, ensuring students can stay on-track with their studies while removing many social pressures. Children all over Australia learned how to ‘go to school’ digitally during COVID.

Alternative providers

If your child’s school cannot provide the necessary support, they may recommend specialised schools.

School refusal is a significant and growing concern among Australian families. By understanding the unique needs of each student, educators and parents can work together to implement effective strategies that minimise the risk of escalating anxiety and school refusal. Whether through early intervention with buddy systems and transition days, personalised support plans, or alternative educational pathways, the goal is to create an environment where every student feels supported and valued.

Open communication, a consistent routine, and a proactive approach to addressing concerns are key to ensuring that students can overcome their anxieties and thrive in their educational journey. With the combined efforts of schools, families, and communities, educators can provide the necessary support to help all students succeed.

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